Wednesday, June 26, 2013

assumptions and prejudices of the twisted human brain

image source:some ecards
image source:some ecards

 this morning a very funny incident happened which gave me the idea for this post. i made a parantha for breakfast for my husband. i served it to him, he had two bites and i shot the question "how is it?" he replied "very nice". a minute later i told him that it is cooked in olive oil. instantly he replied "no no, it is not that great". i swear i could not control my laughter. i realized how psychology plays a substantial role in our liking or disliking a certain person or thing.

had i not told my husband that i had used olive oil instead of ghee he would not have even realized (and  maintained the former stand- it is very nice :p) since olive oil does not have a  peculiar taste and smell. talking about the appearance of the parantha it looked perfectly golden with  brown patches some light some dark, here and there with just the right crisp around the edges (jut the way it would have looked if it was made in ghee). all these years, he had this belief that parathas made in olive oil cannot taste good, however today, when he actually tried one he did agree that it was nice.

we, human beings are extremely complex. if we have formed a presumption about a certain thing or are prejudiced in favour or against a particular person it will always affect our decisions and our opinion about them. it is doleful how we jump to conclusions before giving anything a fair chance.

my mum loves anarkali suits but sadly she always assumed that an anarkali would not suit her since she is not too tall. so last year, around the same time we were engrossed in my trousseau shopping and i asked her to try it. she was obviously reluctant, giving silly excuses like "no no, papa won't like it". i asked her sternly "how do you know he won't like it till you have given it a try? he has not seen  you in the outfit ever. you yourself haven't!". it was high time she tried it on instead of looking at those suits wistfully. so, she finally tried it and i won't lie to you, she looked great. so much, that my dad ended up buying anarkalis for her for two events of my wedding. this is just one example.

there are innumerous  times when we are unwilling and hesitant to try something or hold a prejudice against it just because someone like a close friend or a family member  has a certain perception about it. our decisions then are influenced. how many times have you thought of trying that neon pink shirt and then did not do it just because your sister thinks it is too bright? or how many times have you missed a particular movie just because your friend did not like it? the answer would be MANY.

when i was in my courtship period i asked my husband to tell me a little about his extended family so that it gets easier for me to gel with everyone. my husband being wise enough said" i will not tell you what i think of each one of them, i will introduce you to them. now you speak with them, get to know them and then make your own judgement". he said that keeping in mind that we are two distinct individuals and we might think differently. just because my husband doesn't like a certain someone does not necessarily mean that i too will dislike that person. had he given me his point of view, i would have inferred about them on the same lines as my husband instead of meeting them with an open mind, thinking my husband knows them better.

it is very important for us to give anything or any person who comes our way a fair opportunity without getting swayed by others' conclusion on them. so the next time, you go shopping and you like a dress but your sister doesn't, atleast give it a shot and then decide for yourself, you might end up buying it :).