Monday, August 5, 2013
last time i visited my parents' place (maika) my husband promised them a date i would come home next. my parents could not have been happier. and i would say the same for my husband (giggling). he loves those few days when i am away and he can behave like a bachelor again. anyways this post is not about my husband feeling elated when i am away but the time i have spent at my parents place last week.
it is not that i was visiting them for the first time post marriage. my husband has been sweet enough (read: happy) to let me go for a stay every 1.5-2 months.
after celebrating my birthday with my friends my husband dropped me to my parents' place. since a pest control was carried at home the entire place was in a mess, but it did not really matter. i chatted with my family till 1 and then finally dozed off giving my sleepy head some rest.
it is bizarre and funny how things change post marriage. you still love your parents the same way, you treat them the same way. but there comes a difference in the way they treat you. you are suddenly made to feel all special (not that you earlier weren't) but it is just different. you are not allowed to do any work(it is my house too! why can't i help?).
i realized this when my mom did not let me help her with the chores of the house. since the place was in a chaotic situation and was cluttered with the entire kitchen out in the dining area, i offered my help. but my mom answered "you have come to rest and enjoy" reasoning that the maid is there to help. even after her disapproval i extended my help. the first day got over getting the house back to normal leaving my mom dead tired. so we chose to stay at home that day deciding to go out the next day.
the next day after seeing my dad off to work, me and my mom got ready to go to the mall, hoping to catch a movie suiting our schedule. however when we reached the mall, we did not find a suitable show. so being women we chose the other alternative (it never fails), shopping :p. my husband would be glad to know that i did not shop till i dropped. infact, i will call it minor shopping(lol).
another change after you get married and visit your parents is felt when the topic of shopping is struck. i feel now that i am married i should be paying for myself but my mom argues that i am still their daughter so i should let them pay. finding a middle path, in some situations i have to let her win and in some i rule(it is a tough task).
now me and my mom love going out, even if it is just for a cup of tea or coffee. so now that we were already at the mall and with starbucks also open there (i am a huge starbucks fan) it gave us all the more reason to have coffee. after enjoying our coffee and food we got back home.
on getting back home my mom asked "what will you have for dinner?". i answered "whatever everyone else will have." to this my mom repeatedly questioned me to tell her what I wanted to have. this is another privilege you get post marriage. the menu is prepared as per your wish. your favourite dishes are cooked ( i swear for the last few days i gorged on those sookha tindas, paneer bhurji and kadi).
in the past one week i did everything i liked from helping my mom host her kitty to going out for golgappas to having dhokla and chaat for dinner :p. we went for tea to this little tea lounge in the mall next to our place called "teapot" (it has become a favourite. will post about it soon).
while i was enjoying all the princessly treatment, i will not deny i missed my husband and my new family. so i caught up with them over the phone telling them how i was missing the routine there.
in the initial few months of marriage it was all too confusing, feeling like you are in a no man's land (since you are not at your parents' place anymore and have just shifted in with the new family where the environment is new, people are new and their habits are new). after eight months of marriage it feels that i am finally settled. while i was at my parents' place i kept wondering what my inlaws were doing, if they are missing me like i missed them now. my husband for a change missed me just a little this time(lol, that too would do for me).
sunday finally said hello, and my husband and inlaws came to pick me up. we enjoyed a rich heavenly dinner prepared by my mom. finally it was time to bid goodbye and these goodbyes always leave me with a mixed feeling (marriage is all about such feelings!*eyes rolling*). while it ached to leave my parents' place, i was happy and looking forward to getting back into the routine of my new house.
that feeling of belonging to not just my own parents but also to the new family has finally arrived. i feel an equal part of both the families now.
with that beautiful and delightful realization the maika visit came to an end :)