This is about anything and everything i come across in everyday life. This is about sweet little things that bring you joy and happiness. This is about strange encounters and pleasant surprises. This is like a journal of my experiences good and bad. This is my own little diary in the truest sense.
Thursday, December 12, 2013
EX not AXis
Just the other day I was sitting
with a friend who has been going through a low phase in life (read: single yet
complicated in the head, slow economy hitting the business and the list goes
on). I told him how we are all facing some or the other crisis on the personal
front and that everyone is feeling the economy’s heavy strong firm fist in the
stomachs of their business. He was no exception. The good times will come.
However it was his relationship woe that stayed back with me through the night and
turned into the seed this post has emanated from.
In the following part of this post
you will often notice me referring to the relationship as a dish, so do not get
These days most of us have tasted
the sweetness of a relationship. While some of us are lucky to savour this dish
forever (read: a happy ending; marrying your girlfriend/boyfriend), the
majority gets tired and bored of the same taste and blames it for leaving a bad
after taste, which means the relationship gets complicated, the number of fights
shoot up and soon the ways of the two people sharing the dish are parted. There
are times when the others on the table do not like the taste of the present
dish anymore and want something better and more delectable to suit everyone on
the table OR feel that the present dish can cause you an upset stomach and
hence one is forced to taste another dish (read: family pressure, peer
Every person validates his/her own
reason. The reasons are sometimes forced, often stupid and unreasonable and at
the other times they are simply genuine and coldly pragmatic.
Now, that the dish is gone, how is
one supposed to react?
All of us have our own unique way to
get over the bad after taste; being in the state of sheer melancholy, crying
under the blanket or in the shower, listening to the most depressing songs,
indulging in the shopping therapy. Some
get abusive just to let the frustration out (recall the “flushing the gf’s
picture” scene from the movie “jab we met”), some yell and then there are the ones
who drink like a fish making one wish: to turn back the time. Some sulk for a few
days and move on while others get stuck in that grey phase of whining over the gone
dish for a never ending period. I can go on incessantly if it comes to making a
Looking at the broken hearts around
me I wonder “is any person worth all those tears and pain?”. We see the extremists
making news every other day, where a lover hangs himself or kills his partner
for not loving him back. Is that what a person gets into a relationship for in
the first place? It is absolutely preposterous.
A person is generally in a
relationship to be happy. Fights are obvious because no two individuals are
exactly the same and all relationships hit their rock bottom. That is part and
parcel of the package. But then ideally one should rise above these realizing a
stronger bond with his/her partner and feeling loved. And, if one is unable to
do so for whatever reason, then grumble and whimper. I say DO that for a while
but then MOVE ON.
I do not ask you to erase a person
from your brain. It is impossible to do that. Afterall you would have had some
special memories with that person. You are reminded of him/her every now and
then when you listen to a song he/she loved or see a cap or a nail lacquer of some
specific colour that he/she liked. But that does not mean you let those
memories goof up your present.
Life is not about looking back but
moving forward. Everything happens in life for a reason. I know most of the
times we do not know what the reason is. We feel that the saying is an utter
baloney. But folks the truth is that we do not realize that reason in the short
term. It is in the long term that we understand that whatever happened in
the past was not for good but for the best and has brought us in a much better
place today. Look at my lucky husband, he landed up with a girl like me (he
will probably kill me after reading this line…but I am just telling the truth..giggling
All of us are meant to be with someone.
It might turn out to be our childhood love or a colleague after a couple of
failed relationships. But just because one relationship fails does not mean
that the next one will too.
If you love someone do not give up
on that person but if the other person is not reciprocating do not waste your
time wailing over what you cannot get. It is not the end of the world. Have no regrets. Every tattered
relationship leaves you teaching a lesson, making you a wiser man/woman.
I had once read the following line
in a book and it somehow stayed with me.
“Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted”
Just because a dish was not good at
this one sad restaurant does not mean that it will taste awful at other places
too. The new dish is ordered to experience a better meal.
Take your own time to get back on
the axis of normalcy but do not take forever :)
P.S.: I am singing out loud “don’t you worry don’t you worry child, see heaven’s got a plan for you” and the plan will undoubtedly be better
than you can imagine :D (big smile).